Do You Like Receiving Oral?

When it comes to women’s feelings about receiving oral sex, it’s a complicated discussion. Unlike men who, by and large, seem to love receiving oral sex under most, if not all circumstances, for women, it’s just not that simple. For us, there are many other factors that come into play — and the two big ones are skill and trust. If we’re not feeling secure, then for most of us, no matter how well our partner knows their way around a vagina, we’re just not going to be able to get that into it.

Then, of course, there are those situations where the person on the other end is clearly confused as to what is where and how to even handle our anatomy. That can make for an even more awkward situation, especially for women who are already feeling insecure about being in such a vulnerable position. It’s not easy to be spread eagle in front of someone else, and even those incommitted long-term relationships would sometimes rather do anything butthat.

We already know that some women hate cunnilingus and others love it, but we wanted to know why. Here’s what 11 Bustle readers had to say about receiving.

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Do You Like Receiving Oral?

When it comes to women’s feelings about receiving oral sex, it’s a complicated discussion. Unlike men who, by and large, seem to love receiving oral sex under most, if not all circumstances, for women, it’s just not that simple. For us, there are many other factors that come into play — and the two big ones are skill and trust. If we’re not feeling secure, then for most of us, no matter how well our partner knows their way around a vagina, we’re just not going to be able to get that into it.

Then, of course, there are those situations where the person on the other end is clearly confused as to what is where and how to even handle our anatomy. That can make for an even more awkward situation, especially for women who are already feeling insecure about being in such a vulnerable position. It’s not easy to be spread eagle in front of someone else, and even those incommitted long-term relationships would sometimes rather do anything butthat.

We already know that some women hate cunnilingus and others love it, but we wanted to know why. Here’s what 11 Bustle readers had to say about receiving.

The Expressive Woman & Sexual Appeal

4YAB8rbThe Expressive Woman & Sexual Appeal
J A U S A N ®
“a private online community since 1995”
by Jausan | © 2014 All Rights Reserved
Santa Clarita, California

I have heard the argument too many times by women who scrutinize other women for flaunting their sexuality.  The long-held traditions for women has been to marginalize her voice, opinions, and beliefs to only things pertaining to hearth and home.  Prior to the 21st Century it was expected and acceptable for a horny woman to masturbate her desires away discreetly in the privacy of the boudoir or bathroom.

Her sexuality was viewed as a taboo topic that was relegated to her husband or man rolling atop her, ejaculating and falling asleep with the sexually frustrated woman left to her own devices. In fact, many women faked the orgasms, and even lied to their husbands about their sexual fulfillment.  Since this period women have matured, in the socially expressive sense to find little shame in fulfilling their needs with or without a man.

The woman that is highly appealing to men when it comes to expressing sexuality is that female that explicitly states what she wants firmly and without the shyness and uncertainty of the past. This personality trait is especially attractive to African-American men when it comes to Caucasian women according to an informal discussion forum titled “What Types of Women Turn You On & Why?“. The participation and responses were very diverse without the usual barbs. Women within that discussion group were asked “Are There Certain Things That You would do with or for One Type of Man Over Another?” The answers lead to a very spirited exchange. Several realities were revealed 1) Some minority women placed a high premium on oral sex based on certain factors. 2) Caucasian women in the discussion group viewed it as not such a big deal. 3) There was one thing that crossed all color-lines, the guys in the group preferred women who were expressive, provocative, and more in-your-face, but in a good way.

More specifically, the men explained that they liked a woman who would do all of the dirty things society frowns upon.” One particular gentleman stated that he was not married because he sought a woman who would be bold enough to do something to make him blush. The guys were more reserved, but the women were far more forth-coming.

“Jennifer T. from Denver ” laid the framework that started the controversy. “If I see a guy that I really want to sleep with, I have no problem reaching under my skirt and pulling off my panties in front of him.” Well needless to say, the women thought of her as a w garden tool initially until other women understood her rationale.

Jennifer’s argument wasn’t about attention or anything of that nature, she wanted to have sex and without literally saying “Fuck Me!” she acted on the sentiments.  The modern woman has gone beyond implications and is more likely to openly tell a guy what she wants.  The one thing that many of the women across the board said they would do to attract a man is to not wear panties under short dresses.  To my shock, I learned from some of the married and divorced women that some of them go out to clubs in groups, carefully opening their thighs ever so slightly to the suitor they prefer.  I asked the obvious question “Why?” and almost in unison they responded that some men have no problem grabbing their penises, so this is our answer.

When asked in more detail about the issues of minority women having a hierarchy of sorts in respect to men. And one of the women aptly broke it down “Caucasian men require oral sex and minority men only deserve it based on income, social status, and or they are in a long-term relationship. In short the African-American women within the group agreed that the man would have to be exceptional for oral or anal sex. However when the question was asked to this informal body of 20 men and 25 women of various backgrounds, the question was asked, “Ladies Would You Treat a Caucasian Man Better than any Minority Male?” The result shocked everyone, only five women answered No. The rest gad no shame expressing that African-American men was the choice of last resort.

One of the male participants asked “Why?” and this question opened Pandora’s Box. Many hurtful things were exchanged out of frustration, anger and disdain, but on thing was abundantly clear, the days of African-American women waiting around the Mr. Right who happens to be black are over. Another surprising observation was the topics of other conversations. One female participant admitted that a turn-on for her was to instruct a man to do her the right way. But one thing was clear for the group observation, the women were proud to express thier sexual desires openly and the guys appreciated their kandor. One interesti foot-note, the women polled only registered 51.5% favor women being sexually provocative. Men did better at 97% in favor.

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How do I get out of oral sex with my man?

How do I get out of oral sex with my man? – Jausan’s Questions & Answers.

Recently, I met a guy while in Vegas during the hoidays and wedid the nasty or whatever the latest term is for screwing. He went down on me before I could shut the hotel room door. Everythig seems okay until he wanted me to return the favor. I got out of it over the holidays claiming to have a cold, but he is driving down from Vegas to San Bernardino this weekend. I do like the guy a lot, but oral sex grosses me totally out. Before it even got to that point, I tried to make him stop, but it was so good I could only grit my teeth and moan,,,Hey a girl has her needs…

What can I tell this guy to explain to him that I am not into oral without hurting his feelings are making him feel used after Vegas?

Rosie H.

Marvista, California, USA